Friday, January 25, 2008


Time is so fleeting and it is trite, but true to say, "you blink and a year has gone by."

Yeah, a year-- or seven. Has it really been seven years since I graduated from seminary ? And had it really been over three years since I had heard the voice of my good, good friend from seminary, A.? Oh, how good it was to speak to her tonight.

I've hit a blogging dry patch, it seems. I suppose it is okay for me to have a *few* unreflected moments, right?

However, I really want to maintain connection with all of my blogging buddies, even when I don't much feel like writing anything. So, even if all I post are the ABC's, I'll keep at it because I don't want to have to "reconnect" with you all later down the road.

ETA: I just noticed that someone found my blog by googling "Yuck Amway." That's the best one yet! They were directed to a story I told in a Friday Five awhile back about a guy asking me out and then taking me to an Amway party.

Wednesday, January 16, 2008

I Don't Usually Have Such Freaky Crytpic Dreams...

In that place between wakefulness and sleep this morning, I heard, or more like, felt, a voice that said,

"I am going to say a word. The first two letters in that word is my message to you. That word is 'God.'"

I woke up with that ringing in my ears and, because I'm not so with it in the morning, it took me a few seconds to figure out that the first two letters in God is G-O. Was the message, "go?"

Although I always dream very vividly, I am not accustomed to experiences such as this and it's got me a little weirded out.

The last time I felt like this was almost exactly three years ago. I was at the Princeton Youth Ministry Forum, which was held on St. Simons Island, Georgia. (fantastic place, btw.) I was in a seminar led by Ron Foster, co-author of this incredible youth ministry resource. Ron gave each of us a smooth black stone and asked us to go outside, commune with God, and seek a message from God.

At that time, I was very excited about a prospective call "back east" and was looking forward to interviewing and doing a neutral pulpit a couple of weeks from then. So, I was surprised that while sitting and looking at the ocean, the word "stay" kept coming into my mind.

When it was time to go back inside, Ron passed out metallic markers to write upon the stone words or pictures which described what God was saying to us. I wrote "stay," puzzled a little over that message, but not for very long. I tossed the stone into a front pocket of my suitcase and forgot about it.

Fast-forward a few weeks later- I had been extended the call from the church and wanted so very badly to accept it, but my husband wasn't feeling it. The day I made the phone call to reluctantly turn down the call, I was emptying out my suitcase and found the stone. Although it gave me no comfort at the time, I put it on my kitchen windowsill, where it still sits.

Now, this morning I have this strange experience with hearing the word "God" and being told, in my dreaming, that the first two letters is the message. I haven't done a lot of dream work in spiritual direction or therapy, but this would be very interesting to examine.

hmmmmmm......... maybe it was something I ate?

Sunday, January 13, 2008

Fun Around the Font

My husband and children, who still regularly worship at the church in the city, came to worship with me this morning. It was nice for me to see them there in the congregation; they brought a certain energy with them. Children do that, especially in a congregation with no children.

We were about to begin the reaffirmation of baptism when I asked my kids if they would like to come to the front to sit. I expected them to sit in the first row, but instead they came right up to the font and began to put their hands in the water. This surprised me quite a bit, but I let them run the water through their fingers, all the while with these serious, reverent looks on their faces.

I hadn't planned to, but I then began telling them about their baptisms and how I felt on those special days when J. and I made promises and handed them over to the pastor to be baptized. After about 3 or 4 minutes, I realized that I was completely ignoring the congregation and I looked up and, thankfully, saw approving faces.

It was so much better of an introduction to the reaffirmation than I had planned- thanks to my bold and curious children!

Wednesday, January 09, 2008

I Wish I Could Write a Happy Post

Over the past month or so, I found that I was becoming increasingly more negative and not very much fun to be around. I have had a lot that I have wanted to blog about, but I have been in a place of not really knowing how to express myself. Also, I promised myself that I wouldn't post until I had something positive to blog. I didn't want my place to be one big pity party that no one wanted to come to.

However, now I'm breaking my restriction I've placed upon myself, which probably was dumb anyway. I am torn up by something right now and I wish that I could write about it in detail here, but I dare not because I know that I am not as anonymous as I allow myself to pretend to be.

But, someone I love, admire and respect is hurting right now and I am one of the persons responsible for her feeling this way. It doesn't make me feel any better that this pain is largely the consequence of her inaction and attitudes. I still feel like I could and should have done more. I keep beating myself up for mistakes that I made- and I made quite a few.

I feel like no one should ever put me in charge of anything ever again.

Friday, January 04, 2008

Not So Sure About the Glamour....

The Recipe For Iris

3 parts Humor

2 parts Glamour

1 part Giddiness

Splash of Originality

Limit yourself to one serving. This cocktail is strong!

Tuesday, January 01, 2008

I Need Some Time....

...before I'm able to get back into blogging full-force. I need to take a bit of a breather from 2007 which brought child care shockers, changing jobs, (then losing the job), starting a another new job, the ice storm.....

I'm beat..... and my eye's been twitching..... and I've been a real grump.

So, I may not write very much for awhile. I will say that everything is going just swimmingly in my new interim gig. It seems to be a good fit. Thanks be to God.

Happy new year!

This a reindeer sculpture my son made out of felled branches after the ice storm.